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September 11, One Year Later
Emotional Care
Anniversaries of traumatic events can be particularly difficult times for anyone who was affected by the original event. Although we don't know what it is like for you, we do have a general idea about what many people go through. We would like to share that information with you, as well as some ideas for coping with the thoughts, memories, and physical and emotional problems you may encounter.
The anticipated memorial events and extensive media coverage of the anniversary of the tragic attacks of September 11, combined with fears that terrorists may strike again, may bring back memories and create feelings that surprise you in their clarity and vividness. Don't be surprised if such feelings and images surface; many people will be having these reactions. You and your family may experience:
- Changes in your desire for food or certain types of food.
- Headaches and/or stomachaches.
- Disturbed sleep patterns, including vivid dreams or nightmares.
- Feelings of grief and sadness.
- Feelings of depression.
- Feelings of frustration and anger.
- Avoiding places and/or people who remind you of the event.
- Thoughts of suicide.
Don’t be alarmed if you don't experience any of these reactions. Both experiencing and not experiencing a change in reactions are normal. However, if you have found that since September 11 all your emotions have disappeared and you feel numb, please do consider talking to a mental health professional.
We have all experienced what is known as a “significant emotional event.” Significant emotional events are events so out of the ordinary that they can cause us to change the way we look at things and how we assign value to them. Whether you lived in the New York, Washington, D.C., or Shanksville, Pennsylvania, area on September 11—or were there as a disaster responder—or as a visitor or followed the events on television, there was an overall sense of grief in which you shared. Many who watched the attacks lost, at a minimum, their sense of safety and security.
During the last year, you may have found yourself changing your mind about what is most important in life. While grieving is difficult, it also can be a growth experience. It is important to understand that the recovery process is different for everyone. This anniversary may not be the end of your emotional roller coaster. However, because of what you have already experienced, your ability to cope with events around you may have already been strengthened.
In order to help yourself through this anniversary, and the days to come, there are a number of things that you can do:
Reflect
Look back at how far you’ve come since the attacks. In the last year, your perspective on the incident and its place in your heart, mind and life will have changed.
Look inward and recognize the challenges you have faced. Acknowledge the courage, stamina, endurance and resourcefulness you have shown. Think about your beliefs and faith, and about the people who have helped you make it to where you are now, as well as those you have helped. Don't be discouraged if you think you should be further along than you are in resolving your reactions.
Understand that recovery is not accomplished overnight. Every holiday, special family event or change of season has been the first since the attacks, and may have created strong feelings. After the first anniversary, these special occasions will probably not be as painful for you.
Remember that in difficult times, everyone’s emotions are closer to the surface. Forgive yourself and others when you or they act out because of stress. This is a difficult time; everyone's emotions are closer to the surface. But also be certain that your stress does not become an excuse for mistreating others, or increasing your use of drugs and alcohol.
Talk About Your Feelings
Talking to others who have gone through the same experience can be helpful because they can not only see any visible evidence of the disaster, but also know about the invisible wounds because they may have them, too. If you have considered doing harm to yourself, or know someone who is feeling that way, please talk to your mental health provider, call 911 or go to your local emergency room. Let someone help you find another way to cope with your pain until you can put this event into perspective.
A Word About Children
Children also may react to the anniversary events and media coverage. At greatest risk for anniversary reactions are —
- Children who lost a member of their family.
- Children who lived in New York, Washington, D.C., and Shanksville, Pennsylvania, and were directly exposed to
the sights, smells and sounds of the attacks.
- Children of responders who were fearful for the safety of their family members who were helping other people.
Children may act out the violence they saw and might try, through their play, to “magically” change the outcome. They may show more anger or exhibit other unusual behavior. Younger children may also show other signs of stress including
- Fear of noises, and of the dark.
- Difficulty concentrating.
- Difficulty sleeping and loss of appetite.
- A return to bedwetting.
- Temper tantrums.
To help children deal with their feelings, remind them that the event is behind them. Also
- Encourage your children to talk to you, another adult, or a mental health counselor about their feelings.
- Help them channel their fear and anger toward problem solving.
- Help them relax and focus on something pleasant.
- Give them as much extra attention and affection as possible during this difficult time.
We hope this information is helpful to you, and urge you to contact a mental health provider if you feel you need further assistance.
We remember those who lost their lives a year ago today.
They live in our hearts and memories.
We remember those who sacrificed their lives seeking to rescue and save.
Their courage stands forever.
We remember those who mourn and suffer today.
May comfort and hope be theirs.
We remember those who serve with compassion and diligence.
May their service be a beacon of light to the world.
© 2002 by The American National Red cross
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